Grammar Rules by the Bear

These rules were written by The Bear to help The Unknown Author to be grammatically correct at all times. 

Always avoid alliteration.

Prepositions are not the proper words to end sentences with.

Avoid clichés like the plague—they're old hat.

Employ the vernacular.

Avoid ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.

Parenthetical words however must be enclosed in commas.

It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

Contractions aren't necessary.

Do not use foreign words or phrases when there are, as the French so well put it, mots parfaitement bons en anglais.

One should never generalize.

Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."

Comparisons are as bad as clichés.

Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

It behooves you to avoid archaic expressions.  Avoid archaeic spellings too.

Understatement is always best.

Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

One-word sentences? Eliminate. Always!

Short sentences.  Or sentence fragments. Don’t use them. They are annoying. As hell.

Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

The passive voice should not be used.

If you have to, go three times around the block to cross the street in order to avoid colloquialisms.

Don't repeat, or say again, what you have said before.

Who needs rhetorical questions?

Don't use commas, when, they are not necessary.

Do not use hyperbole; not one in a million can do it effectively.

Never use a big word when a diminutive alternative would suffice.

Subject and verb always has to agree.

Be, more or less, specific.

Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.

Use yor spell chekker to avoid mispeling and to catch typograhpical errers.

The grammar checker is their two help ewe avoid the misuse of homonyms.

Don't repeat, or say again what you have said before.

Don't use repetitious redundancies that say the same thing more than once in the same sentence simultaneously together.

Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.

Apostrophe’s are not to be used as plural’s.

Don't never use no double negatives.

Poofread carefully to see if you any words out or unspelled.

Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

Eschew obfuscation.

No sentence fragments.

Run-on sentences are difficult for the average reader to comprehend and so the facts you are attempting to convey become lost in a sea of words that if allowed to go on long enough will confuse even the most intelligent reader so don’t write them.

Don't indulge in sesquipedalian lexicological constructions.

Abstain from the utilization of grandiose verbiage if circumstances allow the deployment of  diminutive textual creations.
 A writer must not shift your point of view.

Don't overuse exclamation marks!!!

Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences - for example, of 10 or more words - to their antecedents.

Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.

A participle is something you should not leave dangling.

If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.

Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.  It is so last-year.

Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.

Always pick on the correct idiom.

The adverb always follows the verb.
 
Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.

If you reread your work, you can find on rereading, a great deal of repetition can be removed by rereading and editing.

And always, be sure to finish what